Preston Moore: Thoughts, Attitudes & Behaviors

Willingness!  Willingness seems to be the answer to all things.  Because willingness hasn't been coming so easily for me lately, I've been praying for the willingness to be willing.  This was a piece of advice given to me in my early sobriety to combat resistance.  Often, I experience boatloads of resistance around that which I say I desire. In other words, even though I say I want something, my actions often don’t reflect it. For example, I want to feel calmer, more trusting of the process, and embrace the moment, good and bad.  So I tell myself, in order to feel that way I'll need to pray, meditate, make meetings, work out, and eat healthier.  Do I do any of it?  Maybe some, maybe not at all, maybe even for a substantial length of time like 3 to 6 months.  However, do the habits stick?  Hell no!  The insidious thing about it all is, I have the skills to make you think I'm doing all the right things to live in the moment, yet I'm really just trying to self-will what I want to happen. I'm trying to think my w