The Tom Barnard Show

The Vikings may be sitting out this round but The Best Of is playing with that same back against the wall mentality that brought it this far.Clips Featuring: Costaki Economopoulos, Scandinavian Specialties, Eddie McDaniel, and Chuck ForemanSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In the beginning, Mike Lindell had a tendency to stay awake for a week straight. He had some chemical assistance. That chemical is now gone and he flies a private jet. The two are probably at least somewhat related.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A black comedian and Jay-Bee are on at the same time, which means Tom briefly moves back to North Minneapolis to fit in.  Technically the comedian is from Ethiopia, but only for a little bit.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Eddie has trained to be the master of the cold under some Norwegian guy, a skill made practical by the fact that it's sub-zero right now.  And though he and Tom talk at length about drugs, it's really more about breathing.  Allegedly.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you ever get murdered, try not to do it in a field, miles from anything. Otherwise you might find yourself the subject of a long investigation that doesn't go anywhere. One thing we know for sure: it wasn't related to Slender Man. He didn't exist yet.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Most people hate the news. Most people also watch the news for some reason. Some companies have begun saving people from themselves by banning it entirely. Let's hope it sticks. Maybe if we prevent the next generation from ever becoming accustomed to constant bad news they'll achieve world peace.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Tom isn't good at being happy. This isn't a secret. But there is a secret to being happy. The answer to that secret is in Ted's book, it seems. It's not something you have to read, it's something you get to read.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

They can hide behind rocks and trees, but they can't hide from the wrathful hand of Aflac. Or that one Imam.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What's brown and makes your life worse? Heroin is one answer. The Cleveland Browns are another. Technically heroin has a better record, though.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Gangsters often brag about their ice, also known as bling.  Or is that gangstas?  If you're anyone but the Jeopardy judges, you probably didn't think there was a difference.  Ice is also commonly found in Iceland, which is a great place to live if you hate food.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Brett's an actress, psychic, animal savior, and Butler. The name, not the profession. The second and third thing are often related, as it turns out. You can't really talk to an animal, after all.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Is it still bulimia when it's the food making you throw up, not yourself? The polite name for it is "Traditional Food", but we know better.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Even without Kristyn, we can and do still hate most movies. One entertainer we don't hate is Bill Engvall, your friendly neighborhood Batman and future ghost hunter.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's the last chance to get your Best Of taken care of before Christmas! Less stressful than shopping and 100% cheaper.Clips Featuring: Sam Jay, Jenny Zigrino, Fancy Ray McCloney, Jimmy Shubert, Bobby SlaytonSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Grab your healing crystals, because we're going on a spiritual journey. We'll visit everything to Christianity to Islam to Hinduism to Christianity again. But all roads lead back to Judaism. And football.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Some people just can't stay in one place. Jenny's dad is one of those people. So is Ty Cobb, but that's mostly because he was always avoiding people he had previously tried to kill.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's noon, so it's time for some tequila and philosophy. Divorce sucks, modern sensibilities suck, and Dave Chappelle is good. That about covers the overarching themes.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Chicago's still Chicago. We verified that today. The new tax bill is not the same as the old tax bill, and everyone is very upset about that even though nobody seems to know exactly what's happening.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What do you do when your left foot isn't better than the right one? You get it cut off. It sucks, but it's not the worst thing in the world with the right attitude.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Tom and Fancy Ray have exactly one thing in common: they both got out of North Minneapolis. It's hard to fix it from the inside or the outside, so it's time for some ideas. Many of them involve electrifying your electrons.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices