Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

You talk and you talk and you talk and there’s a blank look on their face. You ask a question and they walk the other way as if they haven’t heard you. So you ask louder, then you yell and shout to get our child’s attention. Does it work? No. But you still do it over and over again. In this week’s episode Dr Justin Coulson shares his top 3 tips to get your children to really listen. Links mentioned in this episode: * 21 Days to a Happier Family book * 21 Days to a Happier Family online video program * Have Dr Justin speak at your school or organisation More on this topic: * How do I get my 3 year old to listen? * Why doesn’t my 4 year old ever listen? Free download: * How to get your kids to really listen audio download and cheat sheetSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kids these days are addicted to their devices. My child spends way too much time on screens. How do I get my child to put down his phone and go outside? One of the biggest concerns for modern parents is the amount of time their children are spending on screens and the effect this is having on their health, relationships and wellbeing. But while we are all busy being so concerned, research tells us that parents aren’t setting a very good example and this is having a detrimental effect on our relationships. In this week’s episode Dr Justin will help you identify if you have a technology problem and shares some simple ways to modify your behaviour that will have a big impact on your relationships with each other and with your kids. Links mentioned in this episode: * Have Dr Justin speak at your school or organisation * Parenting Workshop (video seminar) More on this topic: * Is my mother-in-law ruining my child with screens? * 5 Ways to set screen time limits with your children * How to banish tech and make meal

Does it matter how old you are when you have children? It’s a controversial topic and there is no definitive answer. In this week’s episode Dr Justin Coulson looks at the research, in particular a recent correlational study looking at the advantages and disadvantages associated with the age a mother is when she has a child. Dr Justin explains how health and physicality, stability of relationships, life experience, psychological maturity and psychological flexibility all play a part in the type of mother you’re likely to be, depending on your age. Links mentioned in this episode: * Time Out Is Not Your Only Option * Have Dr Justin speak at your school or organisation * Controlled Crying: Is it safe? How to be the best parent you can be, no matter what age: * What Your Child Needs From You * 21 Days to a Happier FamilySee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

“When I was your age…” We’ve all heard our parents say it and some of us may have even said it ourselves. Every generation believes children are losing the art of respect. In this episode Dr Justin explores: * the difference between obedience and respect and how it is unfair to our children to confuse the two * how to deal with a child who has anxiety issues and whose behaviour may be perceived by others as disrespectful * the problem with asking for respect in disrespectful ways * the importance of modelling high levels of respect in our everyday lives Links mentioned in this episode:Have Justin speak at your school or organisation21 Days to a Happier Family You may also like: * 6 Strategies for Respectful RelationshipsSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

If your child was the victim of sexting would they tell you? And if so, would you know what to do? In this week’s podcast episode Dr Justin Coulson shares a personal story regarding one of his daughters who received a request for nude images from a so called friend. Find out how Dr Justin dealt with the situation and what he learned from the experience. “Sexist, abusive and toxic messages are everywhere in the media. The exploitation of girls and young women rockets through primary school and into the teens. But it’s in the younger years that we can make girls strong and free. 10 Things Girls Need Most outlines a radically different girlhood – more connection with nature, more time, peace, affection, and no pressure to start school young, to compete or worry about their looks or clothes.”See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Whether or not smacking children is effective or even acceptable is a topic that polarises people in today’s society. Many believe we’ve become too soft and need to bring back ‘old-school’ parenting – without shame or remorse. Those who are in favour often make the argument that they were smacked and still turned out fine. But, imagine if our children grew up saying they turned out well because of the way they were parented rather than in spite of the way they were parented. In this week’s podcast episode Dr Justin Coulson explains how discipline is different from punishment.If you’d like to discover simple strategies and ideas for disciplining your children in ways that work, and that reduce or eliminate parental guilt then download my ebook Time Out is Not Your Only Option today (just $9.99). The principles and strategies you’ll read are based on some of the very best psychological research that the world has to offer. And when you begin to practise them you’ll notice the difference in your children, and th

Establishing a routine is important for children and adults. We do better and feel more secure when life is predictable, and we get more done. A lot of parents don’t like the idea of a routine because they think it means there is no room for flexibility and spontaneity. In this week’s podcast episode Dr Justin Coulson explains how to implement a simple routine that allows you to have fun and flexibility, but also gives you a framework to come back to when things aren’t going right.For more on the benefits of routine and how to implement one that works for your family, take advantage of our special offer to save $50 off my 21 Days to a Happier Family online video program. Click here and enter the coupon code ‘PODCAST’.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Family, parenting and marriage – all of these are important relationships in our home and they can be tough work sometimes. To make them work, we need to make them a priority. In this week’s podcast episode Dr Justin Coulson talks about marriage. Quality time with our spouse or partner can often go by the wayside, especially when our children are of an age where they need a lot of attention. So how can we give our marriage the attention it deserves? This week, Dr Justin shares some simple to implement tips to keep your marriage on track.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Do you lose your cool with your kids? Do you feel like you’re constantly yelling? In this week’s podcast episode I share my top 4 tips for keeping our anger in check and stay calm and be kind to our children (even when we think they don’t deserve it).See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

No parent is perfect. We have all been totally terrible parents at some time or other. This week’s podcast episode is a humorous look at what makes a totally terrible parent (and a gentle reminder of how to be a great one). If you’d rather be a totally awesome parent rather than a totally terrible one, take advantage of our special offer to save $50 off my 21 Days to a Happier Family online video program. Click here and enter the coupon code ‘PODCAST’.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We all know the phrase “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” And while this may be the case for adults (but not always), unfortunately, when it comes to our children, it’s just not true. The words we use with our children when they are displaying challenging behaviour can be just as damaging as if we were smacking them. Scientists have found that the same areas of the brain light up when we experience psychological pain from verbal punishment as when we experience physical pain. That’s why it is so important to choose the right words when speaking to our children. In this week’s podcast episode Dr Justin Coulson explains the 7 things we should never say to our children and what to say (or do) instead.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Do we need to teach our kids to “toughen up”? Are we molly-coddling our kids too much? We all want our children to succeed but we are often so tired or busy that it’s often easier to do things ourselves. Unfortunately, this takes away all those small opportunities for our children to develop resilience. In this episode Dr Justin Coulson explores the idea of resilience and de-bunks some common myths. He talks about finding the right balance between holding your child’s hand and stepping back to allow them to gain the competence, and thus the confidence, to do things for themselves or face challenging times. For more on building resilience in your child check out Dr Justin Coulson’s book 9 Ways to a Resilient ChildSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this podcast episode Dr Justin Coulson will help you discover your child’s love language so that you can always make sure they know they are loved. Inspired by The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman, Dr Justin identifies the two major love languages that everyone speaks – TIME and UNDERSTANDING – and explores the three additional love languages – TOUCH ME, TELL ME, SHOW ME – which differ from person to person. He explains that when we can identify someone’s love language and then express love to that person, in the way they like it to be expressed, it is wonderful for the relationship. And this applies to our children too.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Studies show that Australian kids aren’t doing enough active play and aren’t taking part in as much active transportation as they used to (eg. walking or riding a bike to school). The current obesity epidemic in Australia is just one symptom of this. In this podcast episode Dr Justin discusses the reasons why Aussie kids are not spending enough time outside, the detrimental effect that this has on their wellbeing and what we as parents can do about it. If you’re interested in learning more about a healthy digital diet for your children check out Dr Justin’s Super Solutions for Technology Troubles for Children from Toddlers to Teens and also his free Technology Tickets.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

When life puts you in a tight spot, don’t ask, ‘Why me?’ Instead, stand tall and say, ‘Try me!’ We’ve all heard the term ‘Post Traumatic Stress’ but what about ‘Post Traumatic Growth’? What if instead of letting life’s challenges and difficult times make us anxious and stressed, we focused on how the experience would strengthen us? This simple change in perspective can be extremely empowering as it allows us to look at adversity as an opportunity to build strength and character. It reminds us that we are who we are because of the challenges we have overcome. But how do we nurture this resilient mindset in our kids, and in ourselves? This episode explores the term ‘Post Traumatic Growth’ and explains how it can help us, and our kids, become more resilient. Post Traumatic Growth is explored further in the first chapter of my book 9 Ways to a Resilient Child.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

When you’re a parent who works full-time, or even part-time, how do you prioritise connection with your kids? Whether we work from home or outside the home, our children want us in their lives and we want to be in their lives. But of course, that’s not always possible. It’s not always practical to go to every school event and sports game. How do we know which ones matter most? And how do we overcome the guilt when we really can’t be there? Our children need to feel like they’re important in our lives. But how do we do that when we have so many competing priorities? Creating clear boundaries, getting creative and keeping communication open is key. And it doesn’t have to take long! This podcast provides some simple strategies for making sure your kids feel like they matter (because they do).See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Think of the times that your parenting has been its best. Those times where you were unconditionally there for your child and it felt right. Show Notes When I ask parents to tell me about those times, these are the answers I hear: * Dinner time conversations * Holidays with no agendas * Weekends at the park or the beach * Playing games in the lounge room * Walking and talking * The last ten minutes each night when I tuck them in and we just chat It seems that time together, really focusing on one another, is the most profound and powerful way for us to build strong relationships and feel like great parents. No parent has ever told me they felt like they were being the best parent they could be while they did overtime at the office, snuck away for an anniversary weekend, or watched a late-night movie. While getting some ‘me-time’ or providing for the family can help us to be good parents, it seems that ‘we-time’, or time together has the potential to bring out the best in us and our kids. This podcast looks at

In this podcast we’re looking at how to make the Internet Invasion – the Screen Tsunami – less cumbersome, exhausting, and outright punishing on the entire family. Show Notes Screens are here to stay and our kids are all over them! They know more than us in many cases, and they want to be on there! And when I ask parents what their biggest challenge is with tech, the answer is almost universal – we just want them to turn it off! * 1:17 60 second psychology – what rules should parents have for tech… according to the kids? * 3:08 What’s the biggest issue that your children face with tech? * 4:48 How much are your children on devices and screens? * 5:40 How do you deal with children refusing to get off a screen? * 7:10 The Screen Tsunami * 7:45 Screens and Relationships * 13:25 Screens and Sleep * 16:01 Screens and Wellbeing * 17:45 Top Tips for having a Healthy Relationship with your Phone * 20:10 3 minute therapy – Oppositional Defiant Disorder * 23:58 3 minute therapy – Reward charts * 27:00 Five suggestions

For episode 14 of the Happy Families podcast we’re looking into discipline. What is it? How is it working for you? What makes for the best kind of discipline? We’ll investigate the 7 reasons punishments don’t work, and take a close look at what great discipline is all about. Show Notes A new segment starts in this episode: 60 second psychology. Today’s research article looks at the impact of parenting style on teenagers decisions around prosocial behaviour, friendship choices, alcohol and other drug use, and academic efforts… and the results may surprise you. And in my 3-minute therapy session a mum asks how to stop the cycle of abuse in her home. It’s an important and challenging question. * 1:43 60 second psychology * 3:55 Punishment as discipline * 4:22 YOUR SAY: What do you think of when you hear the word, discipline? * 5:29 YOUR SAY: What kinds of discipline do most parents rely on? * 6:58 The really unusual response * 7:18 What is punishment? * 7:28 What is discipline? * 7:58 7 reasons punishment is bad

In today’s podcast: Innocence lost. We’re talking about the public health crisis that is pornography and the way that it’s affecting our children. Note – In this podcast I’ll be discussing content that is of a highly sensitive nature. In the past few weeks I attended a conference about pornography and the way it harms young people. On Tuesday February 9, activist group Collective Shout hosted Australia’s first symposium on the harm that pornography does to children. Experts from all backgrounds agree: pornography is hurting our children. I’m going to spend some time sharing things that were reinforced at the conference that EVERY parent needs to know about – because the reality is that your children WILL see pornography. And in today’s podcast, specific tips for every parent for how to deal with pornography in your children’s lives. Show Notes The following resources and people can provide additional information for people who are interested in this topic:Basically… porn is everywhere. A report from the UK Ch