Impossible Coin

Impossible Coin turns one so Tegan, Rocky and Brian turn in our collective self evaluations. As we sort through this complexity we discover that socks versus sweaters is not a trivial distinction, pickles are cucumbers, and that somethings are just too thick for Tegan. We roll a new theme, explore the magic of Barbie video games, Tegan finishes Nier Automata and Rocky is dangerously close to bouncing off Dandara. This episode isn't artisanal. It's farm to table.

Welcome to our extra special, mega-sexy, fully oiled Valentine's Day episode. The crew doesn't quite discuss 100 cupids dropping into your heart but they do honor this most romantic and festive day. Rocky's already found love in the form of Monster Hunter World. Tegan's true love might be The Big Bang Theory. And of course, as Brian slouches toward death, finds love in games as old as he is. *kiss noise goes here*

There are some central drivers or 'themes' to this week's content. Rocky's relationship with Monster Hunter is somewhere between love affair and obsession. The gang realizes that best names for creatures in Monster Hunter are the ones in your heart. We speculate on the possibility that maybe someone should lead EA to a river and have it look at the rabbits. Things get deep when Nolan Bushnell is unpacked. The prospect of an all bard D&D game is discussed all your best erotic video game tweets. THEY ARE EROTIC.

All kinds of business pops off in this episode. Joe Spiro stops by to attempt to fill the Tegan shaped hole in our hearts. Instead he and Brian carry on about old games. There is grim discussion about the Xbox Game Pass service. Various hirings are discussed and we pour one for that one guy who liked Paragon. We hope he likes Smite. Brian discovers that he is an asshole, we get a whole kiwi into a glass and Hoyt Axton stars in a forgotten GBA classic. And the god damn pandas are back.

Look, this episode is a day late but it should be noted that even with the episode being a day late that no member of Impossible Coin is worse than or equal to a panda in awfulness. What we are saying is that pandas are garbage. The team digs into Nintendo Labo and the Q1 shuffle at various studios and David Cage knows Ellen Page. For realsies. Tegan has difficulty planning a diet and the crew pines for sponsorship.

This episode may have everything; motivated shepherd dogs, ASMR NPR, Tegan's hacked washing machine, a plethora of accidental romances, some discussion of Princess Zelda's mom butt in the Hyrule Warriors re-release, a Nintendo mini Direct and the hottest fighting game based on Mad Men. Buckle up kids.

Tegan shares a personal revelation regarding her perceived weakness for gambling. There is talk of a Splatfest or clam bake or whatever those Splatoon 2 things are called. Brian got real close to buying Panzer Dragoon Saga and was able to barely avoid it. Rocky is digging on Good Place theories and the team discusses Smug Fuck Castles in Los Angeles.

So Tegan may be dying. There's that. But our game master, Rocky is hunting for nat twenties to save her. Brian and Rocky talk Monster Hunter World, Tegan tempts Brian with stories of how profoundly busted Elex is and we find out what is mixed in with Rocky's regular porn. We also meet two unscrupulous charlatans, Jimmy Gamestop and Michael Transaction. At least they don't like clopping.

Well, it all comes down to this. Rocky, Tegan and Brian gather to hash out The Big One. What will come of Brian's battle against Splatoon 2? Will Tegan's assertion that What Remains of Edith Finch kill it as dead as the characters in that game? Can Rocky's raw passion for Persona 5 power it onto the list? How much more Hellblade can Rocky and Tegan stand? Where will the twin titans of Nintendo land on the list?   zOMG ALL TEH DRAMA.

It's time for the tough calls. It's time for hurt feelings. Listen as your heroes, Tegan, Rocky and Brian begin to shore up their shady deals for next weeks battle for all the marbles. This week the hills they die on are: Most Reprehensible Business Practice Best Story Most Satisfying Challenge Best Moment

It's time to talk audio y'all. And some other stuff. Tegan, Rocky and Brian are back in the trench for Game of the Year. This week they hit:   Best Audio Best Girl Best Boy Best Art

It's that time of year. Rocky, Tegan and Brian get out the knives (not Gabe Newell's) and proceed to do the Lord's work. They narrow the games they love into arbitrary lists in carefully selected categories.  This week they discuss:   Best Meme Biggest Surprise Biggest Disappointment Best New Character 

The continued slow-motion car wreck that is Microtransactiongate is further dissected by the team. The gang speculates on how to make PUBG more socialist. Brian is concerned about the well-being about a game show host who lives in a cage. Tegan tells us about a new mode in Splatoon and it only sounds filthy. Rocky retells a filthy surrealist joke and unlike Splatoon it actually IS filthy. Woof woof cowabunga.

Hey Impossible Coin fans! We're back to prime you for turkey day. Unless you live in a municipality where turkey will not be served or you don't care for giant, angry game birds. The team gets into DEEP spoiler territory for Doki Doki Literature Club from the sound of the hip-hop air horn to the 30:50 mark. We discuss the disconnect of the PS4 from meme magic, Cole Phelps willingness to test for semen, the boondoggle that is Battlefront II, hypothetical Ohio listeners, and the odds that Mario is going to make time with Minions.

Rocky is out of office this week so Tegan and Brian hold it down and talk about the stuff. What stuff? Mario pro-tips regarding tomatoes, rapidly spreading viruses, the location of Minnesota, EA and the awfulness EA does, and lay-offs at Telltale. Spoiler warning: ugly pants are discussed twice on this show.

Hey team! This week's episode is a few hours early because Brian is home and feels like garbage. His loss is your victory. Some business gets discussed including some Zelda hot takes, Assassin's Creed hot takes and the hottest takes on garbage places to buy sub sandwiches in Arizona. Guest Joe Spiro is a bad influence on Brian and Rocky and draws a through line from one hundred Waluigis jumping out of a plane to Jet Li. Also Moira is trouble and we have thoughts.

The day of days happened and all the video games came out. The team digs into impressions of Super Mario Odyssey, Assassin's Creed Origins, and Wolfenstein II: The New Colossus. Also, the team finally have an opportunity to dig into the implosion of NeoGAF. Nintendo and IO Interactive made the team very happy and Tegan is convinced that Brian should not give his cats milk. Rocky discovers an amusing Twitter bot and wackiness ensues.

The team opened a loot crate that allows them to discuss the end of Visceral Games. The Switch firmware update is neat and full of mystery. The unexpected sequel to the taco discussion is "But is it anime?" Activision's troubling patent prompts some discussion. Rocky is way, way deep into Stardew Valley. Tegan's been playing Doki Doki Literature Club but 'it' hasn't happened yet. Brian plays 'A Mortician's Tale' which prompts Rocky to briefly outline his funeral plans which sound more complicated than an ARG. Games about the death industry. What a time to be alive.

All kinds of business is addressed this week. Rocky is mourning for an anime fan that preferred colder climates. The ethics of zoos are discussed and dismantled. A Russian cyberattack is examined and the team comes to the conclusion that Psyduck's loyalties cannot be swayed. Tegan plays Shadow of War and the team breaks down the current rash of microtransactions. The first rule of Doki Doki Literature Club is that you do not spoil Doki Doki Literature Club.

Everybody the team encountered a personal tragedy this week. Tegan doesn't like tacos. This information was surfaced as part of another conversation about whether or not bandanas are hats. (Spoiler, it's a split decision.) Rocky and Brian hit Kingsman: The Golden Circle a little bit. Video game business takes center stage when the team digs into Andrew House's departure, Street Fighter V Arcade Edition, Huniepop 2 and it's associated moral dilemmas and PUBG. Because there is always PUBG.