Outrage Factory

What made the internet angry this week? Adults don't know shit, and that's okay! Trump is almost definitely getting reelected, which is bad for humanity but great for this podcast! The lamest near-death experience you could possibly imagine! Is puking funny? Jon Voigt is pro-Trump, and this somehow surprises people! Dating people with the same name as your relatives! Derek and Dale are going gay for each other (and ratings.) Masturbating at work okay, but masturbating repeatedly and loudly is not, because this country is ruled by FASCISTS. How to avoid pooping next to people you have to work with. We all need a little bit of shame. 'Nature' is the latest victim of the selfie culture wars. External validation from internet strangers will only ever leave you feeling empty. Canada is getting a bunch of free garbage from the Philippines! All this and more, on a super-duper special episode of the world's least popular podcast.

What made the internet angry this week? The TV show you really like is over, and people have OPINIONS! The internet is 30 years old and we still haven't figured out that online petitions are useless. Robert Pattinson? More like Robert BATtinson, am I right? The Republican Party, a political organization that historically hasn't liked women very much, REALLY doesn't like women, and they're passing some pretty terrifying anti-choice laws to prove it! Donate money to pro-choice organizations and get some baller Outrage Factory stickers. Snapchat's gender-swap filters are upsetting people who invested time, money, and their bodies in getting legitimate gender swaps. If you have sex with yourself, is that incest? Instagram influencers are back on their bullshit. A small city in the B.C. interior is not the progressive oasis we once thought. All that and more on the hardest-hitting podcast you're currently about to listen to!

What made the internet angry this week? SPORTS. Mother's Day. The best species of monkey to eat. 'Dog moms' are neither dogs nor moms, discuss. A southern US state has a surprisingly restrictive approach to abortion! Listen as two idiots with zero understanding of how reproductive organs work discuss how reproductive organs work for twenty minutes. We try (and fail) to understand the YouTube makeup vlogger drama taking the internet by storm. Say a prayer for the poor internet entertainers only making $14,000 a day. A tragic situation compounded by people being judgmental assholes on the internet. A surprisingly sincere look at how we've lost our empathy. All this and more on a podcast episode that is absolutely not mom-approved.

What made the internet angry this week? Joe Rogan: dumb guy's smart guy, or smart guy's dumb guy? Sports Illustrated finds a way to make objectifying women woke, because it's 2019. Can women choose the instruments of their own oppression? Stop indoctrinating kids into religion. We're all going to die from cordyceps. Chinese scientists are intent on making Planet of the Apes a reality. If you give a monkey a human brain, does it become a human? The Chimp of Theseus. Robot Jox is the greatest story ever told. All this and more on an extra-rambly, week-late version of a podcast that you're probably listening to!

What made the internet angry this week? Church rules. The objective value of a human life. A brief history of Jesus. Dunking on the dead. The best fast food sandwiches are fish sandwiches. Potheads are still the world's most obnoxious drug addicts, and 4/20 proves it. Bob Marley should be a saint. We inadvertently shame people who take medication. Actual knowledge we absorbed from other podcasts. World War III is going to start over 50 shipping containers full of garbage. The Duggar family renames deviled eggs and it's the most offensive thing they've ever done. Dale and Derek have differing opinions on how doomed the planet is. Being uncomfortably cold is better than being uncomfortably hot. All that and more, I Can't Believe It's Not a Podcast.

What made the internet angry this week? You can now get fired for liking tweets. Idealistic college students are RUINING AMERICA. Not traumatized enough? You can now inherit it through your genes. Satan scores one against the Notre Dame cathedral. Dale and Derek have STRONG OPINIONS about The Lion King remake. The best Disney movie ever made. Cassowaries are fucking terrifying and I cannot understand why anyone would keep one as a pet. Fuck Australia. We finally settle cats vs. dogs, and it's not even close. We get our first photo of a black hole and it's somehow a woman's fault. The opposite of Dale is Nigel Crane. Hobbit fetishes. All that and more, on the podcast you're currently listening to!

What made the internet angry this week? Every good idea in the universe is taken. Mindfulness: not just hokey hippie bullshit anymore! April Fool's Day has lost all meaning. Fake pregnancy announcements are offensive to people who want real pregnancy announcements. A dozen ways to cook hot dogs. The Japanese have perfected the game show. This week in 'Who Gives A Shit?', this Twitter denizen cares ENTIRELY too much about free tampons for high schoolers. We mansplain proper tampon use. Windmill turbines: good for the climate, bad for your health! Instagram has claimed another 3 victims, may they rest in peace. Science confirms: listening to an entire episode of our podcast won't make you any dumber! All that and more! Podcast!

What made the internet angry this week? Note to space agencies: if you're advertising an 'all-female spacewalk', you better be ready to put the spacesuits where your mouth is. More casual sexism than you can shake a stick at. Dale and Derek are now experts in the following categories: astronomy, biology, female anatomy, science in general, being handsome and charming. Ladies' tees are problematic! Space menstruation: how does it work? How one whale lost its life with one weird trick (eating 88 lbs of garbage). How one dumb sea turtle ruined drinking for EVERYONE. Jordan Peele is allowed to not cast white people. Hiking etiquette, Instagram models, upcoming podcast guest spots, and a weirdly introspective tangent about the stigma around male vulnerability. All that and more! Hey, look, a podcast!

What made the internet angry this week? This week on TANGENT FACTORY, we spend a full ten minutes discussing Derek's internet romance. How long do people have sex for, anyways? Why porn makes Dale's back hurt. Tyler Perry is a celebrity for whatever reason and can't believe how much hotel water costs. Bowling. Vin Diesel movies. The worst atrocity ever committed with bagels. A celebrity was exposed drugging people, but not the way you think! Brexit is the world's most hilarious shitshow. Memes are illegal now. Some people are still mad about Chick-Fil-A, but Chick-Fil-A is still delicious! All that and more tangents than you can shake a stick at, on the world's greatest podcast hosted in Derek's living room.

What made the internet angry this week? In a week full of truly awful news, Derek and Dale spend half of the episode discussing the craziest internet argument they saw this week. Also: altar boy insider information; bodily autonomy and consent: not just for adults anymore!; personal trauma as an internet argument trump card; circumcision; Dale explains the 'credit card'; James Gunn is coming back to direct Guardians 3 because people can't stay mad at one thing for more than a week; Dale helps us meet our problematic opinion quota by coming out in defense of Louis C.K.; Derek explains consent to Dale; and we discuss that batshit insane college admissions scandal that ensnared two of the biggest-name actresses in stay-at-home-mom circles. All that and more, on a podcast!

#What made the internet angry this week? Dale and Derek have strong feels about Daylight Savings Time. Hitting kids in the face with processed cheese: good or bad? The saddest cheese-related meals we've ever eaten. Happy International Women's Day to everyone except the shitty manbabies who complained about it (and also men in general because FUCK YOU IT ISN'T YOUR DAY.) Dale is harassing his coworkers with Annie Lennox songs, which is exactly what they were intended for. Don't climb into zoo enclosures for dope Instagram shots. The trials and tribulations of the modern male photographer. All this, and a whole more you didn't ask for, on the world's greatest podcast*.

#What made the internet angry this week? BREAKING NEWS: POP SINGER MICHAEL JACKSON ALLEGEDLY MOLESTED CHILDREN. We discuss the perfect storm of fucked-uppedness that led to the King of Pop, the new documentary detailing the allegations against him, whether MJ cover songs are still acceptable, why The Beatles should also be cancelled, and why Dale hates...uh....'ethnic' music. ALSO: Momo is coming for your kids, YouTube is punching holes in our brains, the US Civil War 2.0 is all but guaranteed, Kylie Jenner is self-made(?), Will Smith is black (?!). Hey, look at that, another episode of your favorite podcast!

#What made the internet angry this week? A brief history of men knowing absolutely fucking nothing about flirting with women. Dale discovers The Mandela Effect and it's melting his mind. The Oscars happened, and they were relatively free of controversy and therefore boring as hell. Even as a 61 year old in the 1970s, John Wayne had some pretty shitty views, but people are morons for getting mad about it now. Democracy is broken and we're all too dumb to fix it. The most confusing thing about Jussie Smollett is how to pronounce his name, but why he would totally invent a hate crime is a close second. We plan the perfect crime and land on our next business idea. Lastly, menstrual equality is an important cause with a name that will make 12 year old dudes giggle. All this and more on your favorite dumb podcast!

#What made the internet angry this week? Derek made it out of China, where they REALLY like white kids, without getting detained in a Canadian internment camp. Measles are on trend in Vancouver. The Aziz Ansari comeback tour is moderately more successful than Louis CK's, and we have a review. Swastika pizzas. Dale and Derek share tips for how to avoid your own #MeToo charge, and it's easier than you'd think. Hey, remember 50 Cent? A Brooklyn police commander wants him dead! People got pretty upset about an Amber Alert, which seems like a perfectly reasonable response to an abducted child. All this and more, on a very special surprise second birthday episode of your favorite podcast! Songs: 'Loser' by Jagwar Twin (Derek's pick) 'Hush Sally Hush' by Carpenter Brut (Dale's pick)

What made the internet angry this week? With Derek off to china for to celebrate the lunar new year Dale is joined by two guest hosts, Cam and Tyler from the podcast Subspace transmissions (http://www.subspacepod.com/) For the cross over even of the decade. Aparently the new live action Aladdin movie is giving people nightmares... well specifically the Will Smith genie. Liam Neeson somehow manages to milkshake duck himself. Brian Singer is the latest terrible person in Hollywood amongst an endless shitpile of terrible people and it is in fact turning out that Hollywood might not be the utopia we're led to believe. Dale lets it slip that he likes robocop... repeatedly through the whole podcast. Hair and makeup is actually a very important category at the Oscars and they idiotically plan to hand it out during the commercial break. Oh by the way Woody Allen is still a creep. So yeah all movie stuff... but who doesn't like movies amirite?

#What made the internet angry this week? The internet wasn't angry about enough stuff so we spend the first ten minutes of the episode making dumb small talk. Autonomous cars don't kill as many people as you might assume. Derek gets heated about Trump's inability to get a suit tailored. An elected official gets outed for being an insensitive piece of shit, but it's not the one you might think. When is blackface okay? We share the origin story of the legendary Boruiter clan. Columbia House deserved to go bankrupt. Poo transplants are an apparently necessary thing! Someone got kicked off of a plane for body odor for quite possibly the first and only time in history. All this and more, on a very stupid edition of the world's dumbest podcast!

#What made the internet angry this week? Dale spends twenty minutes explaining his literary masterpiece. Saying that men should be less shitty is apparently a really controversial statement to make, as we found out with the #GilletteAd backlash. We also discuss peeing on people, Dale's gout, Trump's fast food photo op and pandering to the poors, competitive eating, shrimp forks, MAGA hats, poor people breeding, slut shaming, sex vs Pokemon, how children impact mobility, and more. You aren't going to hear this shit on NPR! Talking points: If you have a problem with the message in this ad, you need to take a good hard look at yourself The backlash, explained In your face, Dale! This is the dumbest man ever to have held office HAMBERDERS Competitive eating is not great for stable weight White kids from Kentucky are at it again Songs: 'Crowbar' by Frank Carter & The Rattlesnakes (Derek's pick) 'Tokyo' by White Lies (Dale's pick)

#What made the internet angry this week? YouTube entertainers are shitty, awful people. Warning: being woke and inclusive may result in egregiously long acronyms. Going gay for a limited time: woke, broke, or bespoke? Kinder eggs are trying to make us all racist. Facebook's nudity algorithm hates women and dolls, exclusively! Dale and Derek give a lesson in genitals. People are irritated by the latest Facebook 'challenge'! Darkest timeline Derek Bolen is wrecking awesome podcast host Derek Bolen's online brand. All this and more, on your favorite dumb podcast! Talking points: World's dumbest idiot says something dumb That's a lot of letters to remember Why didn't they just call them Kkkinder Eggs? Robots don't understand nudity at all We are almost 40 years old and just understanding this for the first time A brief guide to this totally explainable phenomenon where your friends are posting old pictures to prove that they were once attractive before life beat the shit out of them

#What made the internet angry this year? Congratulations! You survived the angriest year in the history of the planet! Give yourself a hearty pat on the back, then get back to being pissed off about shit that doesn't matter! Dale and Derek cover their top 3 outrage-inducing stories of the year, compare New Year's resolutions, the world's fattest otter, Louis C.K. is back in the news AGAIN for bad reasons AGAIN, and less off-topic rambling than normal. Thanks for spending another year listening to the world's greatest, dumbest podcast!