Preston Moore: Thoughts, Attitudes & Behaviors

There are some conversations that check allllll the boxes... and this is one of them. I met Kendall when she was on Tea with Garyvee - #teawithgaryvee . What stood out to me was, she’s a professional combat athlete, jujitsu and wrestling specialist, business owner, influencer, was the valedictorian of her high school and has struggled with an eating disorder and body image issues most of her life.  One of the most profound things she said during our conversation was “From the outside looking in, I was living this big exciting life, training at the Olympic training center, living in another country, there were pictures of me competing everywhere... But my life felt so small and suffocating because all I could think about was what I looked like, how much I weighed, what I was eating, and when you were going to leave me alone so I could do what I want. I was the valedictorian who was supposed to go off to be some sort of superstar. I knew I couldn’t be that person so I did everything I could to look like I

Have you ever felt like a kid in an adult's body?  In one way or another, I have felt that for years.  I chalked it up to being normal... who doesn't feel like a kid sometimes?  However, what I talk about in this episode is different.  Today, I cover the transition I've been in for the last year or so... moving from a childish and uncertain boy to fully embody my adulthood and manhood.  It sounds funny that I'm struggling with this stuff at 40 yrs old, however, up until recently, I didn't even know this was a thing.   Another way to put it is, going from being an amateur to a professional.  The book Turning Pro by Steven  Pressfield talks about a shift that happened for him in his thirties where he made the decision to quit being an amateur.  That meant, not hiding from what he's meant to do with his life, to quit quitting, quit acting immaturely, making excuses, and avoiding responsibility.  When someone "turns pro" they take care of business, they quit blaming others or their situation, failure doesn't stop

Born to a teenage mother, eventually becoming a teenage mother herself, drugs, dating drug dealers and a propensity for powerful men. Carmell was always chasing the next big thing in an effort to escape the mess and chaos that seemed followed her. After a chance encounter with a stranger who gave her a phone number and said, “when you’re ready to get clean give me a call.” She finally did and it changed the trajectory of her life. Recovery was a tough road for Carmell but what kept her coming back was the sense of peace she felt from those in the rooms. Although Carmell threw herself head first into recovery, she still found herself backed into a corner she thought she could handle. On this episode, Carmell Pelly shares her story of struggle, redemption, spiritual awakening and the message she continues to carry to people today. It’s a message of hope. You can check out her podcast, Recovery Lifestyles here http://www.voiceamerica.tv/channel/recovery-lifestyles-with-carmell-13666 or anywhere you get your po

Preston Moore interviews Rickey Green aka Dolla Green about his new single, Here We Go Again. featuring Kylee Love. There is something that happens when you connect with art.  Sometimes you can't even explain why you like it, you just know you like it.  With Rickey, I connected with his authenticity on Instagram stories first.  Once I realized he was a real person and had a story, I found I appreciated his music a lot more and that he actually could spit fire!  Full disclosure, I also connected with the fact that he's from the south, used to get into a lot of trouble, grew up on hip hop, and is now in long term recovery from drug and alcohol addiction.   I wanted to give you a peek behind the curtain and let Rickey tell you in his own words the story behind his first single off the Face-Off LP.  I hope you enjoy hearing about his inspiration behind the song, his struggles growing up around addiction, jail, homelessness, and his redemption story.  Listen to our long interview

I came across a YouTube video of Ryan Holiday of the Daily Stoic Podcast, if you haven’t heard of it, check it out. What he talked about on the video was “These Simple Words Will Help You Through Life’s Most Difficult Situations.” The one that stood out the most for me was Amor Fati- loving everything that happens. I need to hear and remember this because I tend to complain about all the struggles and challenges I have in life. The Stoics talk about the principle of loving everything, including the struggles, challenges, death, setbacks, hurdles, and barriers that present themselves. Many of my favorites people live by this same principle. @GaryVee talks about how much he loves losing and loving the grind. Byron Katie talks about “loving what is.” Wayne Dyer talks about the Tao and embracing the realization that “there is a time for everything. There is a time for struggle. There is a time for losing. There is a time for stress.” Almost every personal or spiritual development teaching there is, talks about th

I keep having the same conversation with a few buddies that are still out there running and gunning... they say, “man, you’ve been sober so long I figure you’d have it figured out by now” or ”I’m surprised you’re still struggling, I might as well keep drinking and using!” In other words, they’re saying, since you don’t use anymore, shouldn’t your life be easy and amazing all the time, lol! It sounds ridiculous but how many of us think the familiar discomfort and dissatisfaction we feel currently is better the perceived discomfort and fear of the unknown? No matter what you do, you're still going to experience the ups and downs of life. The question is, are you going to be able to experience it without all the distractions that come with drugs and alcohol numbing your thoughts, feelings, and emotions or the chaos of a life filled with dysfunctional behavior? Let me know what you think and remember to join our Facebook group, the High Cost of Anonymity Podcast Group.

Victoria's story is a great example of how easy it is to perpetuate the stigma and hide in plain sight under the guise of high achievement and professional expectations.  There is a fine line between professionalism, career dynamics, and feeling comfortable enough to live authentically without repercussions.  I loved hearing how she navigated self-disclosing that she was in recovery from alcoholism and how it brought her closer to her colleagues, not further apart.  On this episode, Victory shares an interesting perspective as a Ph.D. in social work, trauma survivor, self-proclaimed perfectionist, and experience navigating professionally as someone in recovery.  There are so many consistencies with generational alcoholism and mental health as well as, the extreme efforts some go to to keep everyone believing "we have our life together."   Check out Dr. Victoria Burns on Instagram where she shares her story, advocates for people in recovery, chronic illness, and diabetes.  Instagram https://www.instagram.com/b

I was sitting on the patio at Panera Bread watching news coverage of the Lebanon explosion when suddenly, I was overcome with emotion. Normally, I would shove it down as quickly as possible and move on. I'd tell myself, ”quit crying... there's nothing to be so emotional about. It's not that I couldn’t feel compassion towards someone else’s misfortune. It is more because I am uncomfortable with deep emotion. Recently, I’ve realized how much effort I make to stay even keeled... emotionally right in the middle. Unfortunately, my efforts to avoid the intense emotions of sadness, fear and depression, I also lose my ability to feel to good emotions like happiness and joy. This weird thing happens when one makes huge efforts to protect themselves by avoiding deeply uncomfortable negative emotions. They also cut off their ability to feel positive peak emotions. On this episode I talk about how this time, in a moment of sadness, compassion and gratitude, I actually felt peaceful. Mainly because I’ve been working with

I'm not sure this could get any more stereotypical. A young white boy raised in a mobile home park by a single mother struggling with mental health and an alcoholic father who was never around. In the 6th grade, this young boy finds that selling drugs gave him a strong dose of the attention he never knew he craved. Later, this turned into a life of cooking meth, selling every drug his clientele requested and imitating what he heard on gangster rap records.  In a matter of a few years, this young man, Rickey, aka Dolla Green, went from riding hi and making bank to not even being able to support his own habit. Multiple felonies, prison, homeless shelters, and a lucky break that landed him in drug rehab, Rickey turned his life around. He has since been pardoned by the Governor of Kentucky, is on the board at Volunteers of America, and is a recovery advocate for those trying to bounce back from prison, homelessness, and a life of crime.  Today, Rickey has a successful photography business where he takes action ph

I had a great conversation yesterday with Dr. Melissa Briggs-Phillips aka MBP (I just made that up!) with Behave Forward, Next Generation Behavioral Health in Columbus OH.  Our interview will be out in the next month or so on this podcast so keep your eye peeled! This convo was perfect timing for me because of where I am in my own personal journey.  Many of Melissa's clients are middle-aged males, with variations of childhood trauma.  Although she therapizes all types of clients, I can see why she does well with the male population.  She has an innate ability to cut through to the core of an issue with a good balance of masculine and feminine energy.  In my experience, when working with a mentor, coach, counselor, or therapist, I like them to be able to be soft enough that I'll open up but firm enough to call me on my stories... you know, the ones filled with B.S.!  She didn't ask me to write this and it surely isn't a paid post, #oneday.  I was simply struck by our conversa

Taylor shares a powerful story of early success in business, how his drug and alcohol use got out of control to being arrested multiple times, and eventually attempting suicide. All this while flying under the radar so no one was aware of his struggle.  Finally, after multiple rehab stays and a ton of chaos, Taylor shares how he found recovery and was introduced to yoga, despite every attempt to ignore the signs. Today, Taylor has a passion for living.  A family man, business owner, recovery advocate, and devotee to spreading life principals through yoga.    Taylor Hunt is an authorized level 2 Ashtanga yoga teacher from KPJAYI. He is dedicated to sharing the transformative and healing practice with others by teaching daily Mysore classes at Ashtanga Yoga Columbus and offering workshops around the world. He is also the author of A Way From Darkness and director of the Trini Foundation, a non-profit organization dedicated to sharing the life-changing practice of Ashtanga with those suffering from addiction. Yo

It’s funny, I recorded this episode months back but for some reason never published it. Well, now I know the reason. This morning, in my journal, I was trying to articulate what I’ve been feeling with regards to a couple conversations I had this weekend. The through line seemed to be, “why do I keep ending up in the same predicaments? Why do all my relationships keep ending the same way? How is it that I have a vision of what I want to do but I can’t quite seem to make it happen?” The solution isn’t to get into a new relationship or a new job or to develop a better marketing strategy. The solution is to work on your own insecurity, self-worth and limiting beliefs about yourself. That way you quit attracting the same situations. The best marketing strategy in the world is useless if you don’t have the self worth to execute. With regards to relationships, you could come across the most ideal partner you could have ever dream of, but if you don’t have the ability to be in that relationship, the relationship will

I wanted to check in from Struggle City... Now that it's in my rear view mirror, I feel a lot better, lol! I am not out of the woods yet but getting close. I am about nine days in, on 30 meetings in 30 days. I have started meditating daily. I am on day four of Wim Hof’s breathing techniques and a few cold showers... Holy crap they work! I feel much calmer. It is funny what happens when you prioritize spiritual health, brain health, mental health, and recovery... Magically, everything gets better. On this episode I share all the things that I’ve been working on and a couple really great statements that I read every day that help me keep my perspective. Let me know what you think! here is the Wim Hof breathing exercises I’ve been doing https://youtu.be/tybOi4hjZFQ The meditation where I got the affirmations that are great for perspective https://youtu.be/aIJ4s-8vv-Q and my favorite short recovery meditation https://youtu.be/ATW1dJLUSHg

One of my favorite peeps, Maegan Kenney, joins us to share her addiction story and how she’s navigated the path to becoming a Doctor of Psychology. Full disclosure, one on of the reasons I love Maegan so much is because she is the host of the Addictionary Podcast... a favorite podcast of mine, where I’ve been a host and is responsible for me finding a number of valuable recovery resources I never knew about. I like that Maegan advocates for all variations of mental health and addiction recovery including abstinence, 12 step, harm reduction, cannabis and even hallucinogens as therapy. She also does a great job describing how to navigate self-disclosure in her profession and as a person in long term recovery. I hope you enjoy this episode and be sure to check out the Addictionary Podcast anywhere you get your podcasts as well as on YouTube. You can reach Maegan on Instagram @theaddictionarypodcast Podcast Link https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-addictionary-podcast/id1326876235

I have to say, I’m in a place I’ve never been before. I’ve got nervous energy for days, a consistent knot in my gut and a bit of a cloud hanging over my head. I’ve never really identified with the words anxiety and depression but this is as up close and personal as I’ve ever been with them. Before anyone gets to worried while reading this, I am doing Ok. I am simply at a place in my life I’ve never been before. I’m sharing this with you because it’s important. It’s important for people to see and hear about struggle and not just the highlight reel I share on social media. I am extremely lucky however. I’ve got a set of tools I’ve been using for over 18 years. They come in the from of 12 steps, meetings, prayer and meditation, recovery literature and a huge network of support. When I connect with people in the rooms, on the phone and now through Zoom, there’s this magic that happens. I get to share where I am mentally, emotionally and spiritually. I also get to hear other people share... their tragedy, triumph

Arissa and I grew up in the same town and ran in similar circles. Looking back, it’s funny how, what one thinks as “normal,” is relative. As Arissa put it, “if you didn’t party like me, get out the way”! OK, maybe I paraphrased a bit. There seems to be this common thread among all people... we attract what we are... as functional or dysfunctional as we may be. In other words, we tend to gravitate towards people who see life the way we do, who act similarly and most importantly for alcoholics, who drink and use the way we do. If you’re to different from me, you’ll make me feel uncomfortable and that’s the last thing I want to feel... like I don’t fit in. On this episode, Arissa talks about her Native American heritage, childhood trauma, her ability to function and achieve her goals while trying to navigate life seeking all those “things” that were going to make her feel whole. All this effort only to discover that nothing would ever be enough to “fix” that feeling inside. If you haven’t already, please give us

Perfectionist!? How is that possible, I’m not overly neat, I perform below my potential, I’m typically non-judgmental and the exact opposite of what I consider, a perfectionist. However, I am not very nice to myself. All my perfectionism lives between my ears in form of being self-critical. I talk a lot of crap to myself, I beat myself up and I’m never good enough in my own eyes. What’s crazy about this particular form of perfectionism is, it’s easy to hide and I’ve built a life around it. I’ve become an expert at hiding my insecurities. This is a perfect example of “I didn’t know that I didn’t know.” One this episode, we talk about the insidiousness of perfectionism and how it can also keep you from being perfect. Only when we become aware of something, can we make a positive change. If you have not already do me a small favor and give us a review on iTunes or Apple podcast. We would love to hear from you. Also, remember we have a Facebook community called The High Cost of Anonymity Podcast group. Love you a

Yo fam! Ever get into a place where you feel super annoyed at everyone and everything and yet, you know that you created all the problems and discomfort yourself!? Yep, that’s exactly where I’ve been hanging out lately. What’s even more annoying is that I know this intellectually and still find myself feeling backed into a corner where the only way out is to use. And don’t get it twisted, I did all the “backing” myself. No one pushed me into the corner or manipulated me into the corner... I backed myself into the corner. This morning I “used” self-pity, anger, and frustration towards my wife and in-laws because I had to get up earlier than I wanted to on my day off. Truth be told, this has nothing to do with having to get up or being inconvenienced and everything to do with what I have been doing lately for my recovery, mental health and spiritual health. As one of my sponsors would say, “I’ve been operating out of self-propulsion.” What he means by that is, I’ve been trying to manage my life using force, wil

I didn’t know it until recently but Myric and I are related. She is the cousin of my father and his siblings. It was interesting to hear her talk about growing up and visiting my grandparents home when my father, uncle and aunts were younger. I’ve been paying so much attention to the theme of how mental health and addiction is a family disease. Part of the process is looking back through the generations and seeing how mental health, addiction, strict religious beliefs, illness, and a number of other risky behaviors like workaholism, overeating and gambling are passed down through the generations. I can’t say I’m surprised Myric and I connected on the topic of recovery and that she had the experiences she had. The other thing I’m grateful for is Myric’s perspective on a religious approach to recovery. Religion is something Ive struggled with over the years and I’m glad to be at a place where I can hear a message of recovery without getting caught up in the verbiage or the areas we disagree. It’s important for

Eric Thomas the Hip Hop Preacher text me a message talking about motivation and discipline.  What happens when you're no longer motivated to do something?  What do you do when you "don't feel like doing it today?"  His answer, "you will never be able to always be motivated therefore, you must rely on discipline.  When motivation fails you, your discipline kicks in." Discipline is something that's been missing from my life for a while.  I tend to subconsciously think I shouldn't have to be disciplined anymore because "I've been there and done that."  When I think back to the first 10 yrs of my recovery, I was extremely disciplined.  Everything was about routine, staying sober, and maintaining a sense of gratitude and service to others.  As I started to get more life experience by trying new things and getting up in years sober, I started to selfishly and childishly say to myself, "I'm tired of being responsible, I'm tired of abstaining from all the risky behaviors and I